There are also divorced guys who have never had kids. I find that a divorced guy, who has his own kids has a certain ease around children. He might end up really hitting it off with your kids. Is his breakup any less significant because he wasn’t legally hitched? Again, I’m not bashing the guy who has never been married. He could have always wanted to commit and just never found the right person. But the bottom line is, I shouldn’t be defining who someone is based on whether or not they have ever worn a wedding ring. Maybe divorced or never been married should be treated like a category, a checkbox, just like age group, gender, race or religion.
Fran Walfish, Beverly Hills child, parenting and relationship psychotherapist, author of on WE tv. Fran says, “It's better to date and partner with a man who is divorced than single because single men above age 40 generally have a fear of commitment or other unexamined and unresolved issues from their families of origin.” “Fool me twice, shame on me,” might as well be the divorced man’s motto.
Fran qualifies, “One divorce under a person's belt is a good credential for learning about relationships, including what works and what does not.
Any more than one failed marriage may be a red flag of trouble in that person's personality structure and character.” One of the biggest gifts of a finalized divorce (besides a new lease on life) is the gift of appreciation.
Sometimes you have to wear ill-fitting shoes to appreciate those that are a good fit.” “Divorced men can be better lovers,” says Masini. Masini explains that a divorced man who has a failed marriage behind him may be more interested in making his current relationship work.
As an added bonus, she says, “They want to please you and learn how to do so.
“Let’s face it, the first wife may have taught him a lot of what you are benefiting from now, remembering the little things, what not to say, acts of intimacy, etc.